The Armed Republic of Muffinses is a huge, orderly nation, notable for its museums and concert halls, compulsory military service, and devotion to social welfare. The cynical population of 538 million Muffinesians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Muffiscaland. The average income tax rate is 76.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Muffinsesian economy, worth 54.4 trillion Muffinoses a year, is quite specialized and led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 101,184 Muffinoses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Discarded pennies litter the streets, the fate of the world literally rests on Leader's fingers, artists are pillars of society, and the military has gone fission for more funding. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Muffinses's national animal is the Muffin, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Muffinses is ranked 19,564^th in the world and 359^th in the Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 90.22 law-abiding acts per hour.