The Socialist Kingdom of Free Laos is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by D Souphanouvong with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, zero percent divorce rate, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, devout population of 2.949 billion Laotians are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The enormous, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vientiane. The average income tax rate is 90.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving fully Lao economy, worth 236 trillion Lao rubles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Basket Weaving industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is 80,065 Lao rubles, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Books are so highly regarded in Free Laos that libraries are often revered as holy shrines, executions are marked by quiet dignity and maybe a final round or two of whist, high school bands practice by moonlight, and D Souphanouvong's Twitcher account is typically used to share Indian elephant memes rather than government policy. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Free Laos's national animal is the Indian elephant, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Buddhism.

Free Laos is ranked 20,917^th in the world and 371^st in The Communist Bloc for Lowest Crime Rates, with 89.01 law-abiding acts per hour.