The United Socialist States of Ochelaga is a gargantuan, orderly nation, notable for its anti-smoking policies, soft-spoken computers, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cynical population of 11.299 billion Ochelagans are ruled with an iron fist by the socialist government, which grants its people the freedom to do whatever they like so long as it doesn't involve getting richer than anybody else or challenging the government.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Valois. The average income tax rate is 93.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Ochelagan economy, worth a remarkable 1,311 trillion Bidous a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 116,063 Bidous, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Cops shout apologies with every swing of their baton, people stand their fridges back-to-front to benefit from the free heating, it is common to see Maxémon Trainer listed on Ochelagan resumés, and the dessert 'Death by Chocolate' isn't the most lethal dish on the menu. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ochelaga's national animal is the Crow, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Ochelaga is ranked 12,327^th in the world and 40^th in The Region That Has No Big Banks for Highest Food Quality, scoring 147.31 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.