The Ancient Tellurian Union of The Gallant Old Republic is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by King Alfred IV Edgar Oswin Athelstan with an even hand, and remarkable for its lack of airports, daily referendums, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, democratic, devout population of 25.313 billion Olds are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The minute government, or what there is of one, is dominated by the Department of Spirituality, although Environment and Education are also considered important, while Social Policy and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Winchester. The average income tax rate is 2.0%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The strong Olden economy, worth 551 trillion Gallants a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 21,772 Gallants, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Some are born loving old plays and some have old plays thrust upon them, politicians tend to speak more loudly and slowly these days, sexuality-questioning teenagers are placed in locked rooms with dirty magazines and lewd posters, and forty-year-old men are asked for their ID before watching the latest pony cartoon movies. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. The Gallant Old Republic's national animal is the Carthusian Marmot, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is English Ordinariate Catholic Church.

The Gallant Old Republic is ranked 577^th in the world and 2^nd in Right to Life for Most Primitive, scoring 320.89 on the Scary Big Number Scale.