The Free Land of The Ferret Lands is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by The High Chief Ferret with an iron fist, and renowned for its public floggings, keen interest in outer space, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 14.953 billion Ferrets are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Aavak City. The average income tax rate is 99.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Ferret economy, worth a remarkable 3,644 trillion Cacaos a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 243,705 Cacaos, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Nine-year-olds' chat logs are scoured for evidence of radicalization, companies struggle to cover for the hordes of employees on parental leave, lawyers are ordering red ink and 'Cease and Desist' rubber stamps in preparation for the return of copyright law, and studio executives abandon tragic stories of star-crossed lovers because "it's been done". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Ferret Lands's national animal is the Ferret, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Nahuatl.

The Ferret Lands is ranked 314,421^st in the world and 3,574^th in the Pacific for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 974.82 Standard Monetary Units.