The Dictatorship of Gir Toritzpoldi is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, renowned for its keen interest in outer space, pith helmet sales, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 9.358 billion Gir Toritzpoldians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 51.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Gir Toritzpoldian economy, worth 430 trillion pounds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, Tourism, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 45,957 pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Droves of former desperados are applying to join the border police, charged suspects often have to wait years before the courts have room to judge their trial, the nation's navy has been named the scourge of the seven thousand seas, and newspapers and TV broadcasters are given a list of 'acceptable words'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gir Toritzpoldi's national animal is the emu, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Gir Toritzpoldi is ranked 268,587^th in the world and 79^th in Keep of Darkness XL for Highest Food Quality, scoring 6.84 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.