The Maniacal Egotism of Cyptopir is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Kaelthar Tyrannis with an iron fist, and notable for its smutty television, ritual sacrifices, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 2.354 billion Cyptopiriots are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The medium-sized, corrupt, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ironhold. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 69.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Cyptopiriot economy, worth 387 trillion Moners idks a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Gambling. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 164,824 Moners idks, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,487,972 per year while the poor average 2,215, a ratio of 671 to 1.

Schools offer a range of lessons in subjects as diverse as The Economics of Bullying for Lunch Money, there's a mortuary next to every Cyptopiriot restaurant, if there's something strange in your neighborhood you call Brancaland, and tourists are flocking to the newly-built MeteorLand family resort. Crime is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Cyptopir's national animal is the Phoenix, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Creed of Ashkara.

Cyptopir is ranked 234,310^th in the world and 4,461^st in the Rejected Realms for Nudest, with 84.25 cheeks per square mile.