The Democratic Republic of Inner Albania is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Robert Hoxha with an even hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, rampant corporate plagiarism, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 3.796 billion Inner Albanians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Tirana. The average income tax rate is 68.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Inner Albanian economy, worth 489 trillion leks a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 128,910 leks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

All children's clothes come in only cream and off-white to prevent offense, the government has declared that sharing is uncaring, antique comic book collectors are disappointed to hear that their treasures are worth exactly as little as their mothers said they were, and the number of students attending university has reached a record high. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Inner Albania's national animal is the white-tailed eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Inner Albania is ranked 6,254^th in the world and 176^th in the South Pacific for Most Beautiful Environments, with 2,080.89 pounds of wildlife per square mile.