The Most Glorious Dictatorship of Cidonia is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Viktor Nazar with an iron fist, and notable for its national health service, ubiquitous missile silos, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 39.087 billion Cidonians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cid City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 23.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Cidonian economy, worth a remarkable 6,356 trillion Cids a year, is quite specialized and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Book Publishing. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an impressive 162,614 Cids, with the richest citizens earning 7.4 times as much as the poorest.

The government puts forth the claim that harming young girls is wrong, third world countries are rich in "I Love Cid City" t-shirts, colonists who were promised new lands find only war-torn devastation, and camo-patterned plush comfort blankets are standard issue for commandos. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Cidonia's national animal is the crab-eating macaque, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Atheism.

Cidonia is ranked 267,598^th in the world and 1,359^th in Europe for Safest, scoring 11.85 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.