The Republic of Castlacha is a massive, safe nation, ruled by President Jerick Henriquez with an even hand, and remarkable for its aversion to nipples, sprawling nuclear power plants, and national health service. The compassionate, devout population of 2.683 billion Castlachans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Albarecado. The average income tax rate is 81.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Castlachan economy, worth 397 trillion Morlies a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 148,142 Morlies, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

News headlines suggest that President Jerick Henriquez has a sideline in guinea pig pimping, road signs are getting harder to read under layers of knitted woolen cardigans, artists are renowned for their ability to make art pieces out of thin air, and arbitration is mightier than the sword. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Castlacha's national animal is the Castlachan Dove, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Castlacha is ranked 156,834^th in the world and 160^th in NationStates for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 533.54 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.