The Republic of Cardinal is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its ban on automobiles, ubiquitous missile silos, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, devout population of 1.738 billion Cardinalians are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The medium-sized, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital City. The average income tax rate is 54.4%.

The powerhouse Cardinalian economy, worth 153 trillion Currencies a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 88,443 Currencies, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.7 times as much as the poorest.

Foreign nationals are widely distrusted, EULAs remind customers that "Private Mode" is a browser setting rather than a promise, the same 1738 social media bloggers always loudly and immediately agree with Leader's every word on Twitcher, and the might of the entire Cardinalian Navy is focused on fifty bemused spear-throwing islanders. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cardinal's national animal is the Animal, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Cardinal is ranked 219,067^th in the world and 4,995^th in The North Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 49.01 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.