by Max Barry

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The Fattest Citizens in the Pacific

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

As a region, the Pacific is ranked 11,855th in the world for Fattest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
41.The Perpetual Suffering of Overwelming oddsIron Fist Consumerists“It's not dead, till it's dead”
42.The Imperium of WardenLibertarian Police State“There is no escape from a savage”
43.The V2 Missile Range of SchwarzgeratNew York Times Democracy“A screaming comes across the sky.”
44.The Colony of ScaelesAnarchy“Pride and Industry”
45.The Texas Chain Saw Massacre of LeatherfaceCapitalist Paradise“You are what you eat, So eat what you are”
46.The Dominion of Tetsukaze WukongFather Knows Best State“Eternity is now”
47.The Dictatorship of Southern MallapubCorporate Police State“Profit Over People!”
48.The Federal Alliance of MorganhamLibertarian Police State“Ruling for twenty years with the same motto! ...Wait -”
49.The Elizbastanian Protectorate of StrasilIron Fist Consumerists“Unite, for the Future!”
50.The Federation of TisreelIron Fist Consumerists“Might Makes Right”
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