The フェデレーション of Nowa Europa is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Prezydent Iga Świątek with a fair hand, and remarkable for its unlimited-speed roads, daily referendums, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 13.521 billion Nowa Europeans live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Silesia. The average income tax rate is 39.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Nowa Europan economy, worth a remarkable 4,818 trillion banknotes a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 356,365 banknotes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

High school band practice is often crashed by technicolor-clad ravers, government officials sit helplessly as they are labelled 'Pompous Womples' by celebrities, motorists must pay to enter inner-cities during peak hours, and the nation's politicians are known more for the internet memes they spawn than any of their accomplishments. Crime is well under control. Nowa Europa's national animal is the Water Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Nowa Europa is ranked 285,728^th in the world and 5,245^th in the South Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 0.22 flags saluted per person per day.