The Borderlands of Right Crimea is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Overlord of Everything You Ever Saw with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, rampant corporate plagiarism, and state-planned economy. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 2.218 billion Right Crimeans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Administration, and Industry are also considered important, while International Aid and Education are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the unnukeable. The average income tax rate is 58.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Right Crimean economy, worth 261 trillion nukes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Automobile Manufacturing, and Information Technology. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 118,033 nukes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

Babysitters are a thing of the past, the police crack down on tax evaders without mercy, even doll houses and dog kennels have to be able to withstand rigorous earthquake testing, and slow dancing is made trickier when Auntie Edna insists on standing between the couple's arms. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force. Right Crimea's national animal is the fallout, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Meism.

Right Crimea is ranked 291,236^th in the world and 11,210^th in Balder for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring -19.36 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.