The Dead Region of Not Great Patrick is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Herr Van Treppkoven with an even hand, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, fear of technology, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 10.705 billion Worthless Beings have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Industry, although Administration, Public Transport, and Spirituality are also considered important, while Law & Order and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Broskeyburg. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 24.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Worthless economy, worth a remarkable 1,005 trillion Patmark but worses a year, is led by the Soda Sales industry, with major contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Pizza Delivery. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is 93,883 Patmark but worses, with the richest citizens earning 8.2 times as much as the poorest.

Brown Sugar 101 is a popular course at community colleges, wilderness-dwelling hermits are surprised to find railway stations on their front doorsteps, authorities are looking for a stool pigeon to rat out who is stealing food from pigeon toilets, and days begin with afternoon tea. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Not Great Patrick's national animal is the Catdog, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Not Great Patrick is ranked 49,424^th in the world and 4^th in Region Name for Most Corrupt Governments, with 40.42 kickbacks per hour.