The Holy People's Imperial Union of Jyalek is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Holy People's Emperor Aleksandr Drakonin with an iron fist, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, public floggings, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 14.785 billion Jyalekians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Administration, Education, and Industry also on the agenda, while International Aid isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Aleksgrad. The average income tax rate is 64.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Jyalekianese economy, worth a remarkable 1,063 trillion Drakoes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Trout Farming, Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 71,921 Drakoes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

The government funds large training centres to turn Gûps into functioning members of society, Jyalekians are free from pain - but the side effects include loss of individual thought and freedom, prankster scientists legally change their names to silly pseudonyms before major discoveries, and everyone apparently sends Holy People's Emperor Aleksandr Drakonin hair-filled lockets, offers to die heroically, and poetic desires to co-parent a child. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Jyalek's national animal is the Gûp, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is People's Imperial Cult.

Jyalek is ranked 219,962^nd in the world and 7^th in Second Karpati Pact for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -5.48 on the Clooney Contribution Index.