The Republic of I Always Choose The First Option is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and notable for its ritual sacrifices, compulsory gun ownership, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 13.136 billion I Always Choose The First Optionians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital City. The average income tax rate is 1.3%.

The frighteningly efficient I Always Choose The First Optionian economy, worth a remarkable 4,188 trillion Currencies a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 318,847 Currencies, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.9 times as much as the poorest.

Leader reduces citizens' commute times by giving away their homes, atheistic refugees haven't got a prayer of being granted asylum, the nation's reputation for treachery has left it sidelined on the international stage, and hospitals have to sell their computers on vBay in order to afford the ransomware decryption payments. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. I Always Choose The First Option's national animal is the National Animal, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is National Religion.

I Always Choose The First Option is ranked 288,111^th in the world and 10^th in TERRY for Most Primitive, scoring -546.89 on the Scary Big Number Scale.