The Queen's State of Esterhazle is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, notable for its complete lack of prisons. The democratic population of 33.005 billion Esterhazleans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The minute government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Education, with Industry and Welfare also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Defense receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital Heights. The average income tax rate is 7.0%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Esterhazlean economy, worth a remarkable 1,353 trillion betales a year, is quite specialized and led by the Gambling industry, with significant contributions from Pizza Delivery, Basket Weaving, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 41,010 betales, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

A large-scale revitalization of the education system is underway, genetic researchers have been expelled, streakers swamp all public events in order to bare it all, and Esterhazle has designated Capital Heights as its capital city. Crime is moderate, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Esterhazle's national animal is the deer, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Esterhazle is ranked 245,255^th in the world and 366^th in Ancient Lands for Lowest Crime Rates, with 53.4 law-abiding acts per hour.