The Kingdom of Eclaire III is a massive, safe nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape and compulsory military service. The hard-working, democratic, devout population of 1.445 billion Eclaire IIIians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The relatively small, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Welfare, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 11.8%.

The very strong Eclaire IIIian economy, worth 94.9 trillion Éclairian Flowers a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Door-to-door Insurance Sales, Arms Manufacturing, and Basket Weaving. Average income is 65,655 Éclairian Flowers, with the richest citizens earning 8.9 times as much as the poorest.

The country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, military spending recently hit a new high, scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes, and students memorise knock-knock jokes for their mandatory twice-a-term Comedy Examinations. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Eclaire III's national animal is the Éclarian Turtle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Eclaire III is ranked 18,663^rd in the world and 20^th in KAISERREICH for Most Primitive, scoring 81.79 on the Scary Big Number Scale.