The United States of Crapolica is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Meow East with an iron fist, and notable for its smutty television, zero percent divorce rate, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, cynical, humorless population of 46.374 billion Crapolicans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The relatively small, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Public Transport. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Crapolica Central. The average income tax rate is 48.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Crapolican economy, worth an astonishing 10,750 trillion yungrams a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Gambling. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 231,818 yungrams, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.0 times as much as the poorest.

Spoiler warnings are now given out before political speeches, the government insists that a ghost voted ten million times in the last election, organ donation rates are among the lowest in the region, and Occam's razor has sliced to pieces any childhood belief in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crapolica's national animal is the dapan, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Cowardism.

Crapolica is ranked 1,279^th in the world and 1^st in The AGS Commonwealth for Safest, scoring 157.63 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.