The Republic of of Costas Unidas is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Sebastian Scutther with an even hand, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and restrictive gun laws. The democratic, devout population of 11.284 billion Costas Unidasians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Santiago de Chile. The average income tax rate is 17.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Costas Unidasian economy, worth 661 trillion florins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Cheese Exports. Average income is 58,648 florins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Seven-year-olds debate for weeks on the merits of the Oxford comma, the country routinely whitewashes uncomfortable parts of its history, one-man canoes fitted with the latest tracking technology leave no room for one man, and the government's new priority is citizens' access to cat videos. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Costas Unidas's national animal is the dolphin, which can occasionally be seen avoiding garbage in the nation's murky oceans.

Costas Unidas is ranked 219,668^th in the world and 7^th in Organization of United Sovereign States for Most Primitive, scoring -96.31 on the Scary Big Number Scale.