The Holy Corporate Green Dynasty of Caltof is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Mr Business with an even hand, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, absence of drug laws, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 15.988 billion Caltofians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The minute, corrupt, liberal government, or what there is of one, is effectively ruled by the Department of Healthcare, with Education, Law & Order, and Defense also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ancapistan. Income tax is unheard of.

The powerhouse Caltofian economy, worth a remarkable 3,610 trillion BitCoins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Retail, Gambling, Arms Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 225,850 BitCoins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

The phrase "you might think that but I couldn't possibly comment" is the closest you'll get to a straight answer from Caltofian politicians, fraternities are notoriously exclusive, the government has declared victoria over the cheese menace, and the full title of Hon Mr Business Vcte Mgve MF HCGDCLM GCCE runs to several pages. Crime is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Caltof's national animal is the Cow, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Libertarianism.

Caltof is ranked 293,672^nd in the world and 12^th in Hollow Point for Lowest Crime Rates, with 3.28 law-abiding acts per hour.