by Max Barry

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The Fattest Citizens in Lardyland

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

As a region, Lardyland is ranked 5,417th in the world for Fattest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The People's Republic of RedundididiaCorporate Police State“To work is to work is to work”
2.The Confederacy of Free-Market ParadiseCorporate Bordello“The markets are free, the things IN them are not.”
3.The Nomadic Peoples of Lardyland Peronist RebellionAuthoritarian Democracy“JOIN THE LARPERs!”
4.The Nomadic Peoples of PhilzaAnarchy“Thats a nice bird”
5.The Great Hero of MasterSpamChiefIron Fist Consumerists“The Master Chief of Spam”
6.The Fiefdom of Naejiro ChiwaInoffensive Centrist Democracy“I have given thee courtesy enough”
7.The Republic of Admoniam DiecornlandInoffensive Centrist Democracy“From Many, One”
8.The Republic of Lands to Defend the InnocentInoffensive Centrist Democracy“Motto...”
9.The Gameplayer of the Year of BruhgundyIron Fist Consumerists“I eat liberations for breakfast”
10.The Matriarchy of Mother Knows Best StateCorporate Police State“Ur mom.”
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