The Empire of Reslania is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Emperor Jones with an even hand, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, daily referendums, and keen interest in outer space. The compassionate population of 4.626 billion Reslanians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Scintillante. The average income tax rate is 81.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Reslanian economy, worth 457 trillion Notes a year, is quite specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Cheese Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 98,910 Notes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Crowds of flag-burning protesters tend to accidentally become crowds of burning protesters, solid-gold toilets are Reslanian prisons' least expensive furnishings, stony-faced ratings board panelists are unamused by free lap dances, and computer users are buried daily in thousands of unsolicited emails. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Reslania's national animal is the Red-Tailed Hawk, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Reslania is ranked 142,714^th in the world and 203^rd in Conch Kingdom for Most Patriotic, with 10.24 flags saluted per person per day.