The United States of America of Arrstotzka is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by President John Calhoun with an iron fist, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, smutty television, and enslaved workforce. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 16.598 billion Americans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry, Healthcare, and Education are also considered important, while Welfare and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Columbia. The average income tax rate is 70.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient American economy, worth a remarkable 3,890 trillion US dollars a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 234,387 US dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

Arrstotzka recently hosted the least successful trade negotiations since The Phantom Menace, increasing inclusiveness is a sign of the times, the government sends submarines to retrieve bodies from shipwrecked submarines, and children dream of becoming physicians and physicists. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Arrstotzka's national animal is the bald eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is not mandated.

Arrstotzka is ranked 43,651^st in the world and 8^th in Pax Britannia for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 5,134.41 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.