The State of Ahvenanmao is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its complete lack of public education, complete absence of social welfare, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 22.569 billion Ahvenanmaoans are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The minute, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital Heights. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 5.5%.

The thriving Ahvenanmaoan economy, worth 841 trillion betales a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Trout Farming, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 37,272 betales, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 162,973 per year while the poor average 5,377, a ratio of 30.3 to 1.

Voting is voluntary, the alarmingly racist TV show 'Bigtopians Say the Darndest Things' is a hit, all tariffs have been abolished, and Ahvenanmao has designated Capital Heights as its capital city. Crime is a serious problem, probably because of the absence of a police force. Ahvenanmao's national animal is the deer, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Ahvenanmao is ranked 285,840^th in the world and 9^th in Podgorica for Lowest Crime Rates, with 38.27 law-abiding acts per hour.