BarbariaBoard

Kazakborat wrote:

SIC: Somewhere in the outskirts of the Kazak steppe, lies a fortified structure, huddled into an old fallout shelter. In the center most part of the structure, is the main chamber that acts as the living quarters for its hibernation devices. Out from behind the darkness approaches the figure of a man, without showing his face, he speaks to his comrades near and around the country, through a secured broadcasting channel. For ten minutes, this advertisement is played throughout the world, reaching every television set in every nation. Disclosed, and untraceable.

IC: "Comrades of the World. I speak to you briefly, so hear my voice before it is suppressed. Listen to my message, and understand what I am about to tell you. The world is changing, and not for the better. Fascists are emerging once again, the war is ravaging the global economy, and the dawn of capitalism is fading. It will only be a matter of time before everything collapses, unless we, the workers of the world, stop it before it can do any further damage. Let us all come together, and rebuild the world, so we don't have to worry about starting over. The age of man is over, but the time of machine is coming. Let us adapt, and let us overcome. We will survive, but only altogether can our efforts be collectively accomplished.

Even if what I said may not come to fruition, we all know that the Kaiser of the Hyperborean Empire possesses weapons to reset the international stage, even if it means the destruction of the entire planet. That tells me that we, the rest of the world, have one common enemy - the very power that aims to destroy everything for their benefit. They claim the lives that socialism inflicted, but likewise capitalism isn't innocent to its blunders. Ironic, really. That is why I will be the first to announce my campaign to spread the workers' revolution, first by establishing a socialist state in Kazakborat. Within days, the Red March will commence, and thus initiates the first of a new age, beginning with the civil war in Kazaborat.

WORKERS OF THE WORLD UNITE!"

- Thus beginning the Kazakborat Civil War

Kazakborat wrote:

IC: The Eastern Advance

Prior to the first advance from the West, the secret leader has assembled his resources to push the great offense against the Tsarists - those loyal to the Tsar and the present regime. After his broadcast around the globe, he reveals his identity to his followers, and the world. In a promotional video, depicting the socialists' march, standing before a makeshift podium, with the Kazaki socialist banner, and a few guards.

"I will no longer hide in the shadows, and so those viewing will witness my ascension." the silhouette fades into a standing man, tan in complexion, with a thick, jet-black chevron mustache. "Yes, it is I...Mr. Minski!" he praises as he salutes to the audience.

Mr. Minski pulls out a picture of the Kaiser of the Hyperborean Empire of Vostag. It has a drawn in toothbrush mustache, thick eyebrows, a top hat, and a lollipop. "I let my child draw on this picture, and now I burn it. HA!" the mad man flicks his lighter, and smolders the odd picture. "I sent him fan mail one time, and he never responded, he broke my heart!" he begins to solemnly moan.

"Anyways...He's trying to topple the Peoples' will, brainwashing his citizens, and peoples abroad. They censor, oppress, and repress true equality, the message of socialism, and the tranquility of those who spend their hours making the fat cats money while they sit on their arses, eating while its people starve. The Kaiser makes socialism look bad, but really it is all for perspective. I plead to Hyperboreans, and everyone abroad to not listen to him, and instead listen to yourself and your instincts, tell me what is right! Join me, join the revolutions!"

"After receiving funds from 'donators', I can now liberate the People, and then so on!"

Mr. Minski posts a picture of him burning an effigy of the Kaiser, using the #EvilEmperor trend on his instagram account.

Meanwhile, five brigades of the new Kazaki Peoples' Front, are inbound, Eastward.

IC: The broadcast doesn't make it through in Hyperborea proper but in some far flung corners of the empire they gain a new television show for a few minutes about an angry foreign man speaking in a foreign tongue, drawing a mustache on pictures of the Kaiser, a man who already has a beard and mustache, before burning it. The few who see the broadcast end up changing the channel to their usual shows and eventually the signal is roughly determined to be coming from somewhere in centeral/western daguo and the interference is dealt with.

Hedra wrote:

IC: Reed eyes widen as he sees the Kaiser’s name pop up, he then gasps in excitement. “ITS ITS... ITS KAISER ODINSON!! KAISER ODINSON SAVED US!!” Reed turns to Eckhart and begins to poke him in as telling him to share this excitement with him. Reed then turns back to the Kaiser and clears his throat. “I mean... thank you for the rescue sir!” Reed salutes him from the backseat and then places his hands on his lap, his leg still shaking in excitement.

Volohk wrote:

IC: Eckhart nudges Reed over as Reed's excitement is nudging and bumping into Reed as they are jam packed together in such a small vehicle.

"Stop... Stop... Calm down I see it too." Eckhart says as he tries to get Reed to calm down.

Eckhart gulps before speaking to the Kaiser. "Thanks for the save back there sir. We were beginning to think we were toast there for second. Reed and I got separated from the rest of our unit and were working to make our way back when we got pinned down."

IC: From the Vault

"Is he normally like this?" The Kaiser says responding to Reeds over-excitement.

"Sounds like you got lost like me. I uh... took a fall out of a helicopter. Anyway I've been trying to get back to friendly lines since then. So you said you're making your way back to your unit? I take it that means you've got working commlinks and maps in your onboard computers? I would've used mine but it's been busted since I hit the ground. So I'm going to have you tell me which direction to go while giddy over here blasts anyone who tries to get in our way."

Eckhart and Reed guide the Kaiser as he drives them through the city. Thankfully the small, overloaded car is agile enough and fast enough to outrun or outmaneuver any Muan patrols and checkpoints they come across. They drive-by several Muans along their way.

Eventually they make it back to where the Hyperborean Foreign Legion were fighting and the fighting is still going on but the legion isn't at their previous position. When the trio of lost soldiers arrives they find a massive Muan assault taking place against the Foreign Legion who is taking cover the best they can. Reed, Eckhart, and the Kaiser pull up on the scene and get out and begin opening fire on the Muans to help in the fight.

"Glad you two could finally join us!" Lt. Krueger yells seeing Reed and Eckhart finally return to the group. "Oh and you brought a friend." He says taking note of the Kaiser being with them.

The legion has its collective backs against the wall. The Kaiser quickly looks around and sees a large Muan bank which seems to be heavily reinforced.

"The bank! Fall back to the bank! Reed, Eckhart, and I will cover you all. Go! Go now!" The Kaiser yells.

On the Kaiser's order the soldiers begin giving each other covering fire as they make their way inside the hardened walls of the abandoned Muan bank. They barricade the door as best they can and fortify there position in the bank. They agree upon taking shifts guarding while the rest of the group holds up in the bank vault as a sort of makeshift bomb shelter. This set up does the trick for now in keeping the Muans from overrunning them while giving the the soldiers of the Foreign Legion somewhat of a reprieve from the long, and hard fighting of the day.

Kaiser Odinson sits down and leans against the wall of the bank vault with much of the other soldiers in the Hyperborean Foreign Legion who aren't on the guard shift.

*sigh* "Oh gods has it been a long day, and the day isn't even over yet." the Kaiser says, a bit of a cringe in his voice as he whinces somewhat from the pain.

"You don't mind me asking sir but just what the hell were you doing behind enemy lines like that?" Krueger asks.

"It's a long story..." and with that the Kaiser explains most of the story of what has happened to him thus far; the being blasted from the vertibird, the fall, and the journey of walking and eventually driving through the city fighting and evading Muans along the way, excluding the classified portions. "...anyway that's the story. Say none of you would happen to have some Med-X?"

Ast wal wrote:

IC: Ast Wal's representative steps up to the podium at the head of the assembly chambers.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the assembly. I stand before you today because a new front in the Lemurian war has opened. The so called communist revolutionaries in Kazakborat have declared that they intend to spread a world revolution against the will of other nations. To shove their socialist ideology down our throats. This is in direct violation of the Rights of Nations the founding document of our organization. Such a violation of the RoN in previous times of war such as the one we are in now has resulted in the ejection of the guilty nationstate from this assembly. However seeing as this is a civil war in Kazakborat they have no membership here at the moment. So ejection is out of the question. Marking these violators as the enemy against Barbaria that they are is not, I think, out of the question.

Now I'm not calling for a war against all communist nations, so to our socialist leaning colleagues of this assembly you have no need to worry, but I am calling for war on these particular communists as they share the same goal as the Lemurians. In fact I call upon the socialist leaning members of this great assembly to declare war on these Kazakborati revolutionaries because frankly they are giving you guys a bad name. If you can find it in yourselves to call the Lemurians, who wish to impose their brand of ideology on us all through domination or bust then surely you can find it in yourselves to do the same here. All of us member nations have agreed to a certain common set of principles. What these Kazakborati rebels propose is in violation of those common principles. I propose war against these rebels because they have shown their goals to be one and the same as the Lemurians which we are currently fighting. And as is precedent, in the possible event these rebels seize full power in Kazakborati then and only then should the final option of ejection be considered.

In this war I propose a "shooting fish in a barrel" strategy in which we reinforce the nations bordering Kazakborat with UTF troops to contain these hostile forces forming our "barrel" while a round the clock, non-stop campaign of airstrikes and bombings are conducted against these forces within Kazakborat to pound them into dust. This strategy can go on nearly indefinitely if need be and poses the smallest amount of risk to UTF forces and at minimal cost at the same time."

IC: The mysterious man makes a second broadcast. "Hello, world. Yes, Hi. I would like to make some statements before the world condones genocide; first off, we are not backed, influenced, or anything by the Lemurians. That is a lie told for propaganda. Secondly, I have not conducted any acts to force nations into accepting socialism as their center ideology, but rather I personally called for a social awakening. However, if you wish to try and kill me, you can go for it. However, I have many brethren and connections that can seriously foil your ambitions.

Also stating that you wish to declare war on my party is involving the UNB in a civil war, which I know personally that the international body would avoid involving themselves in a civil war.

I would also like to warn anyone that intends to follow this foolish mission; you could use every weapon in your arsenal, use all the manpower you can muster, and unleash as much hell as your heart can take. You will never end our mission, even if you slay every last man. We will survive because we know the land, and we know how to kill. While you bomb your hearts' content on our cities, and slay countless people, the only thing you will gain will be the infamy you've bestowed. The only thing your killing off are a People. Even when the last Kazaki is gone, the ideology will move on. Your war will be fruitless.

So, I tell you no-name representative of Ast wal, come at me. Bring your friends too, we can have a great party!" Borat changes the direction of the camera, turning to an endless army in black ski masks. In the background is a burning flag of Ast Wal, chanting in native Kazaki. "Also I know 'Common'. Implying I was speaking another language was kind-a racist. Good day!"

Ast wal wrote:

IC: Ast Wal's representative steps up to the podium at the head of the assembly chambers.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the assembly. I stand before you today because a new front in the Lemurian war has opened. The so called communist revolutionaries in Kazakborat have declared that they intend to spread a world revolution against the will of other nations. To shove their socialist ideology down our throats. This is in direct violation of the Rights of Nations the founding document of our organization. Such a violation of the RoN in previous times of war such as the one we are in now has resulted in the ejection of the guilty nationstate from this assembly. However seeing as this is a civil war in Kazakborat they have no membership here at the moment. So ejection is out of the question. Marking these violators as the enemy against Barbaria that they are is not, I think, out of the question.

Now I'm not calling for a war against all communist nations, so to our socialist leaning colleagues of this assembly you have no need to worry, but I am calling for war on these particular communists as they share the same goal as the Lemurians. In fact I call upon the socialist leaning members of this great assembly to declare war on these Kazakborati revolutionaries because frankly they are giving you guys a bad name. If you can find it in yourselves to call the Lemurians, who wish to impose their brand of ideology on us all through domination or bust then surely you can find it in yourselves to do the same here. All of us member nations have agreed to a certain common set of principles. What these Kazakborati rebels propose is in violation of those common principles. I propose war against these rebels because they have shown their goals to be one and the same as the Lemurians which we are currently fighting. And as is precedent, in the possible event these rebels seize full power in Kazakborati then and only then should the final option of ejection be considered.

In this war I propose a "shooting fish in a barrel" strategy in which we reinforce the nations bordering Kazakborat with UTF troops to contain these hostile forces forming our "barrel" while a round the clock, non-stop campaign of airstrikes and bombings are conducted against these forces within Kazakborat to pound them into dust. This strategy can go on nearly indefinitely if need be and poses the smallest amount of risk to UTF forces and at minimal cost at the same time."

IC: Chairman Lao denounces this motion, citing it as a clear and obvious move against the socialist world. "First they'll come for the Kazaks, then they'll come for the Quings."

OOC: *looks at the board for ranking on national economies* LEEEETTTTTTTT'SSSSSS GOOOOOOOOO!

Ast wal wrote:

IC: Ast Wal's representative steps up to the podium at the head of the assembly chambers.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the assembly. I stand before you today because a new front in the Lemurian war has opened. The so called communist revolutionaries in Kazakborat have declared that they intend to spread a world revolution against the will of other nations. To shove their socialist ideology down our throats. This is in direct violation of the Rights of Nations the founding document of our organization. Such a violation of the RoN in previous times of war such as the one we are in now has resulted in the ejection of the guilty nationstate from this assembly. However seeing as this is a civil war in Kazakborat they have no membership here at the moment. So ejection is out of the question. Marking these violators as the enemy against Barbaria that they are is not, I think, out of the question.

Now I'm not calling for a war against all communist nations, so to our socialist leaning colleagues of this assembly you have no need to worry, but I am calling for war on these particular communists as they share the same goal as the Lemurians. In fact I call upon the socialist leaning members of this great assembly to declare war on these Kazakborati revolutionaries because frankly they are giving you guys a bad name. If you can find it in yourselves to call the Lemurians, who wish to impose their brand of ideology on us all through domination or bust then surely you can find it in yourselves to do the same here. All of us member nations have agreed to a certain common set of principles. What these Kazakborati rebels propose is in violation of those common principles. I propose war against these rebels because they have shown their goals to be one and the same as the Lemurians which we are currently fighting. And as is precedent, in the possible event these rebels seize full power in Kazakborati then and only then should the final option of ejection be considered.

In this war I propose a "shooting fish in a barrel" strategy in which we reinforce the nations bordering Kazakborat with UTF troops to contain these hostile forces forming our "barrel" while a round the clock, non-stop campaign of airstrikes and bombings are conducted against these forces within Kazakborat to pound them into dust. This strategy can go on nearly indefinitely if need be and poses the smallest amount of risk to UTF forces and at minimal cost at the same time."

IC: "Well it is apparent no one has actually paid attention to what the representative from Ast Wal said. They never said the Kazakborat commies are being controlled or influenced by the Lemurians. They said their goals are basically the same. These communists in Kazakborat just tried to call for revolution in all our countries. Threatened to impose their ideology on our nations and people. Which is EXACTLY against the RoN. It's plain un-Barbaria. It's also obvious no one listened to our Ast Walian friends proposal for how to conduct this. What they propose would not hurt our war effort against the Lemurians what so ever especially given the size of Kazakborat and these rebels. I'm not saying we go in and do some nationbuilding. We just do like the Ast Walian representative says and pulverize them from above. A cheap and easy solution which can be done long term like was said. Not an invasion. I support this proposal. However, if there was going to be an invasion there are two nations which come to mind that I think would be best suited for this job and who I hope support it. Those nations being the Greater viking empire and Tritra." Remarks the Berber representative.

IC: President Alduin stands before the UNB assembly, his broadness echoes through the chamber. He peers over the body, keeping the first minute of his time to speak, absolutely silent.

"What we have before us is a menace, sweeping across the world. I strongly support the representative's clause for notice. We should strike clear and immediately. I volunteer Sovern's forces present in Uikastan, who are currently active in the country. I also at the moment, working with the leadership of Mesotamia, so accessing their air space isn't a problem. I would require permission from Inner Vestil to allow our forces to transgress through your jurisdiction to get to Kazakborat the most efficient way. I could go around Daguo, but weather at this time of year isn't the most favorable or logistical. Our forces in the space force is present active in Mu, and elsewhere. This would be a test of trust for Inner vestil from Sovern. If you know what is good for Barbaria, you will let our forces access your air space to complete the task. I will also be reaching out to the recognized regime of Kazakborat, the Tsarists. You will be expecting a message from my administration.

Sovern has various strategies we can select; we have various scales for the radius and application of destruction...

First Strike - Minimal air strikes, selective and singular in pattern. Usually targeted against individuals, and small groups. Although our accuracy is almost inhumanly correct. We have effective strategies, technologies, and infantries that are financed and refined to handle guerilla defense, and logistical challenge. This is what we used to stabilize Uikastan in the brief Sovern-Uikasitani War.

National Tragedy - Large scaled escalations of mass destruction, a radius of average damage can be similar to that of the destruction of an entire city, at once - immediately. Infrastructure will be rendered unusable. It will take generations to return to normality.

Fallen State - The complete dissolvement of everything within a nation - their soil will be salted, their children infertile, and possibility of recovery becoming absolutely impossible. This will allow us to rebuild a nation from the ground up, in the vision of a proper state. We will become their Gods.

Obviously, under my word, we will only use 'First Strike'. It should be effective enough to topple the militant socialists. Under the 'Wilkiv Doctrine', the Federation of Sovern will be the sword that carries the will of Barbaria, and its obligation to purge socialism from the planet. It is our sworn duty as the People to counter every opportunity that the evils of leftism engulfs and corrupts the morals of a civilization.

Socialism is the death of individuality, and individuality is what makes us human.

I will accept Ast wal's request to intervene in the war, and eliminate the militant socialists in Kazakborat, under the doctrine to re-establish stability in Kazaborat. I will be sending in forces from the Sovern Air Division, and the Sovern Army to invade Kazakborat and begin our counter-advance on the socialists. Further information will be open to those who que its operations. Our prime directive is to eliminate the socialists with extreme prejudice.

I can only wish them a quick and easy death. I praise the brave men and women who will be serving their campaign to eliminate these rebels. For Babaria, for the Federation!"

The berber states wrote:

IC: "Well it is apparent no one has actually paid attention to what the representative from Ast Wal said. They never said the Kazakborat commies are being controlled or influenced by the Lemurians. They said their goals are basically the same. These communists in Kazakborat just tried to call for revolution in all our countries. Threatened to impose their ideology on our nations and people. Which is EXACTLY against the RoN. It's plain un-Barbaria. It's also obvious no one listened to our Ast Walian friends proposal for how to conduct this. What they propose would not hurt our war effort against the Lemurians what so ever especially given the size of Kazakborat and these rebels. I'm not saying we go in and do some nationbuilding. We just do like the Ast Walian representative says and pulverize them from above. A cheap and easy solution which can be done long term like was said. Not an invasion. I support this proposal. However, if there was going to be an invasion there are two nations which come to mind that I think would be best suited for this job and who I hope support it. Those nations being the Greater viking empire and Tritra." Remarks the Berber representative.

IC: "On behalf of the northlands, the Vikings support your cause. We will be joining Sovern on this great task to destroy socialism, and the evil that comes from it. May our enemies be cautioned by the wrath that we will bestow. Unlike the Soverns, we will not hold back. It is destruction, or nothin'!"

OOC: Dog-piling on a godmodding noob? Count me in. Noob flesh is back on the menu boys!

IC: President Smith speaks, "Volohk shall be joining Ast wal, The berber states, Sovern, the Greater viking empire, and Tritra in the elimination of the Rights of Nations violating communists in Kazakborat. Volohk shall begin airstrikes immediately and will be providing aid to its fellow UTF allies. We must stop them from taking the country or should we fail that we will be forced to blast Kazakborat to oblivion. "

IC: As General Grant makes his way through Inner Vestil, on his march, he briefly bumps into a little Vestilian girl, offering him a poppy, with cherry smile on her face. "Hello!" he greeted in her native tongue. Grant smiles back, and accepts the poppy, sealing it in his personal journal. By the time Federation forces arrive at the rally point, designated officers are tasked at directing their subordinates to the set-out strategy that was ordered directly from the President.

"...It appears that we will be reinforced with air support soon, I find it odd that so many fighter jets are being dispatched, just to settle a minor civil war - along with four other countries involved..." mentions Lt. Odlavih.

"In our details, we're expecting a reasonably sized portion of the reserves, and the President himself is dispatching his finest weapons...It would appear that he wants to advertise Sovern's military might to the rest of the Red Bloc. If you pay close attention to his last orders, he made numerous patrols in areas that would most likely catch the attention of the standing armies of nearby nations. It is with intention, does this man want the world to know what Sovern is capable of. He wants a quick, and easy settlement. If this war lasts longer than a month, it can catch the wrong kind of attention in Congress. The faster he resolves the situation, the sooner can he heavily influence Western Daguo." Grant replies in monotone.

"Regardless, with all these overwhelming forces, we shouldn't expect this war to last too long."

"That is a bold assumption to make. You should never underestimate your enemy. We are fighting a very partiotic force, one that knows the land, the wildlife, climate, and every plausible route they could use to retreat in, whether it be in the vast caves, or under the protection of their rigid landscape. These people would rather die than give up their dream. Let's be honorable and fight as if we were fighting the world. We must show that Sovern is still merciless and cruel to those who oppose the Federation. We must slaughter every last communist, regardless the infamy." Grant shudders the room, "Now, let's get back to work, we have a country to liberate!"

The next coming days, Sovern drones would selectively survey the land and begin low-scaled attacks against confirmed transport routes and vessels. The second stage is to begin rooting out plausible 'danger zones', where gruella tactics could be used by the enemy, defensively and in ambushes. The forces that Grant was bestowed are the finest in their field, experienced, and battle ready. A strong march begins Westward, capturing and securing the lost base. From there, intelligence will give us an idea, from that perspective, where they retreated to, using the military's finest tracking instruments. The same fort has been established as a forward operating base, any possible threats to plants that may have been left would be snuffed out and neutralized. In that position, Grant re-organizes his forces, and divides them into two main divisions, one advancing, and on acting as a buffer between the socialist territory, and friendly territory. Sovern has also opened up the base to allow ally aircraft and garrisons to be stationed and maintained.

King Gerald Steps on the Podium with an Important Speech. "Within The last week or so, the nation of Kazakborat Has been dealing with Communist Forces. We will not stand by and watch Communists take Kazakborat! It is A threat to Our very nation. Therefore We must intervene. I Hearby Declare war on the Communist Forces in Kazakborat! We will send Immediate forces with 1000000 Infantry, 10000 Fighter Jets and tanks. and 1000 "Specialized Forces". We will Win this war.