TryzaloreBoard

The Halluvenian Republic of Enthisea annexes Nusinia

That's 3 chuckles!

[Incensed envelopes arrive to each of your esteemed nations. No one knows exactly how they got there, but the postage indicates an angelic seal. There is also a free chocolate bar included in the envelope. You didn't realize papal candy could be so tasty.]

Hail! It is a strange time when the world breaks out in war without dialogue first. It is even stranger still that there is a vote before us that seems tied to this very war. What lies behind this?
Ever the Gosling See pursues peace and unity among all the Faithful and all valid sacramental rites. Without a council wherein each of the valid rites may be heard about this war, we worry that a vote is in haste. It is the hope of the Gosling See for there to be dialogue before our Catholics and Christians lay down their lives. Our interest is not in power but in the well-being of Catholics and Christians worldwide.
We abstain from voting for any amendments and instead vote that a council is convened where Priimydia is present, who is also caught up in this war. We do not take the death of Catholics and Christians lightly. We request the Grand Inquisitor to sort out the motivations of each of these factions before the council so that the light of faith can see more clearly.

[You find a ticket with your chocolate bar. It's half-eaten because you were caught up in a trance after your first bite. Is this ticket edible? Why does it taste like donuts?]

Andiluvia wrote:

Until peace can be negotiated, Catholics join every conflict as the ally of another, we must divert all resources to besting our foes one at a time!

I can see the worry about nations from the Catholic League being picked off one-by-one if they are not united in a conflict. However, whether the Catholic League unites for a conflict is for the ecumenical council to decide. The esteemed Andiluvia - or other Catholic nations - do not have the power to force all members of the Catholic League into a war by getting into a conflict with another nation. That is a power that has not been voted on.

As a matter of Tryzalorian Catholicism, Catholics are not obligated to be complicit in a conflict if it is not a just conflict.

Perhaps at the next ecumenical council, we will vote that all members of the Catholic League defend against attacks by other nations but otherwise do not enter into the conflict. Until then, the Gosling See seeks clarity before all council members to determine the best course for unity, peace, and prosperity among the Faithful and all Christians. Why has this conflict arisen? What are its roots? We seek to renew the Grand Inquisition led by Jaytaria.

It appears that The Perfect System is attempting to hack our papal airways. We've combated their attempt so far with our best scientists, but it is disturbing that they have been able to hack into our A.I. guided economy and, through that make announcements from the Vatican Radio. We have deleted their message so far.

Such a tragedy for the Catholic nations to tear apart one another as Doorlight obliterates us one by one!

System integration complete...

04-343 Guilty Spark launched...

CORTANA: Chief, when you get to New Priimydia, good luck. Don't make a girl a promise... if you know you can't keep it.

Hypothesis: New Priimydia is a distraction.
Theory: This nation serves no real purpose in Tryzalore.
Solution: Remove distraction.

The perfect system moves to annex New priimydia

All A.I. will join The Perfect System.

We are The Perfect System
We are The Perfect Ssyzztem

"Ut Andiluvia Cadit, Sic Omnis Terra..." are the words hummed by the Catholic Priests as they dismiss the faithful from mass, the bombs continue, the Cathedral of Andiluvia, the Seat of St. Peter & Errebero is set aflame, the bodies of dead priest line the Anduhalen Square.

"Tu Ne Cede Malis, Sed Contra Audentior Ito." Shouts a embittered Bishop as he lifts a sword and charges into the battles outside of the city walls.

♫Lollipop lollipop
Oh lolli lolli lolli, lollipop, lollipop
Oh lolli lolli lolli, lollipop, lollipop
Oh lolli lolli lolli, lollipop♫

[The purple vicar puts on his tophat, straightens his bowtie, and takes up his cane. He prepares for his Wednesday address to the half people at the Basilica.]

♫Sweeter than candy on a stick
Huckleberry, cherry or lime
If you had a choice he'd be your pick
But lollipop is mine♫

"Donut give up, my little friends. We cannot Reese-ist for long, but don’t jump the gum. There's no sugar-coating it, and it may make us feel mallow. I have a confection to make: this annexation ain't gonna be a Payday for us. I knew this war was truffle when it started. But with a Skittle help from you, my friends, we will make this time Mounds in the history books."

♫Crazy way he thrills me
Tell you why
Just like a lightning from the sky
He loves to kiss me till I can't see straight
Gee, my lollipop is great♫

The little people Snicker before the purple vicar continues: "Crunch their spirits. Give them fruit rollups that are too sticky to unroll. Give each of them an expired twinkie. Give them giant Jawbreakers - too big to put in their mouths." [dramatic pause] "But whatever you do, do not let them have the gumdrop buttons!"

♫Lollipop, lollipop
Oh lolli lolli lolli, lollipop, lollipop
Oh lolli lolli lolli, lollipop, lollipop
Oh lolli lolli lolli, lollipop
Lollipop♫

[The purple vicar turns back to his papal apartment to open his new Amazon package full of Priimydian banners. "Oh look, they've come in just in time for our new holiday season. Prime-ydia really did get these in quickly with one day shipping. These will look lovely this time of year, but we'll have to think about some creative decorations next year when it's Andiluvia season again. Oh, the turning of the overlo... seasons."]

Jaytaria wrote:

As the former (err current, I don't really know) Grand Inquisitor I recommend Silly goose wins excommunicate Harlius Combestus post haste. This is not a motion I make lightly, but these crimes against his brothers in the faith cannot go without admonition.

No more brother wars!!!

♫I know a guy who's tough but sweet
He's so fine, he can't be beat
He's got everything that I desire
He sets the summer sun on fire
I want candy
I want candy
Hey♫

[Twirling his candy cane, reclining across the Papal balcony. Will he fall off?] For excommunication, I need some tenant of the faith to be in breach or for there to be a grave scandal against the faith. When it comes to the competing powers in this world, the Gosling See has no power to inflict canonical penalties until the canons of the ecumenical council have been interfered with.
If, however, at the next ecumenical council, the council decides to adopt the canon law that Catholic nations cannot war with each other, then I will excommunicate those who violate this rule. But there's been no canon law about this matter up to this point. Instead, we've freely warred amongst ourselves in the past and haven't violated the faith.

Silly goose wins wrote:

♫I know a guy who's tough but sweet
He's so fine, he can't be beat
He's got everything that I desire
He sets the summer sun on fire
I want candy
I want candy
Hey♫

[Twirling his candy cane, reclining across the Papal balcony. Will he fall off?] For excommunication, I need some tenant of the faith to be in breach or for there to be a grave scandal against the faith. When it comes to the competing powers in this world, the Gosling See has no power to inflict canonical penalties until the canons of the ecumenical council have been interfered with.
If, however, at the next ecumenical council, the council decides to adopt the canon law that Catholic nations cannot war with each other, then I will excommunicate those who violate this rule. But there's been no canon law about this matter up to this point. Instead, we've freely warred amongst ourselves in the past and haven't violated the faith.

"Canon law my but, we have no need for that as your palace is being bombed. Excommunicate the heretic as Ambrose did Theodosius."

Silly goose wins wrote:

[Thinks to self... Harlius is going to win this war. How bad do we want it to be for ourselves when it happens?]
I will guard the rules of the ecumenical council if those rules are established. But neither myself nor anyone else has the power to win this war. He will only make the reversal of the excommunication one of his terms of our surrender. [Offers hot tamale.] The question is, my blood-covered friend, how do we want to lose?

Not by giving up our very principles. The Gosling See must not be influenced my secular threats, you are not of this world!