100% Real, Non Opinion News With Ralph Jacobson III

Hey, Hey! I am Ralph Jacobson III, notable for my "opinion an controversy" publishes. I love it! Especially for being part of the 10% of Glenwoodians who earn 262,000^W a year! Ha! what a mess Glenwood is!

That dumb war with Glenwooderlian-something an the glorious Tasmanian people is getting out of control. Why won't Glenwood just bomb the Tasmainian's instead of bombing the Tasmanian's? Ridiculous! Plus, it's over some squaky birds, native to Glen-goo-gaa-somethin'.

That's enough Not trash talking the Glenwoodian government. See you next time with another 100% Real, Non Opinion News With Ralph Jacobson III. That's me!