The Blood and Conquest of Europa Alternis: Every Name I Tried Was Already Taken

When Aguaria Major was recognized by the modern world as a nation, and its blue-skinned natives introduced to it, the new nation fell in with a bad crowd. For as fast-developing and democratic as they were, they had trouble discerning the intentions of the rest of the world. So when a deranged, psychotic, and above all capitalistic region known as Europa Alternis, whose opulently clothed leaders fought apocalyptic imperial conquests as a game for their inner circle, came to Aguaria Major and offered them a position within their cabinet, they didn't refuse, not realizing it was a ploy by the capitalists to humiliate and destroy them in their game, for Europa Alternians' universal hatred of communism, especially in nations like the fascist Alpenraum or cutthroat Capitarium. Within a week of Aguaria Major's placement in the administration of Europa Alternis, the capitalists launched an all-out war on the new nation, seeking to destroy their entire way of life and take the pristine archipelago for colonial land, and exploitation. Aguaria Major would not have this. The nation stood firm, and defended its homeland, quite courageously. While Aguaria major's military was more than able to match that of the Europa Alternis denizen nations if it faced them individually, the fact they all attacked together proved too much for a victory beyond the naval and aerial battle victories that drove those few capitalists who were already there out, and kept the rest of the invaders off Aguaria Majorian shores (though, in a remarkable feat, no Europa Alternian set foot on Aguaria Majorian soil after the nation sought to defend itself). Though, no matter how many times the Aguaria Majorians fought them off, more of their forces, due to the fact the opposing coalition was 20 nations strong, just kept coming. So no possibility of completely eliminating this threat to their islands was possible, and it would also prove impossible to defend the archipelago forever, as its defense, due to the greater combined military might of the capitalist coalition, was taking a grisly toll on the populace of Aguaria Major, and ships and planes were being damaged and destroyed faster than Aguaria Major could build them. The Aguaria Majorians needed a way to end the onslaught, and fast, and they also vowed eternal vengeance on the capitalists for the amount of Aguaria Majorian blood spilled. Thus, with new technology supplied to them by the leading scientists of The Communist Bloc, a region who recognized the Aguaria Majorians' plight after a representative of theirs visited Europa Alternis, and its faraway new nations (Aguaria Major), Aguaria Major created a super weapon. They used genetic engineering to rapidly grow an army, millions strong, of super-strong, super-fast, super-aggressive, hyper-intelligent, 10-foot-tall super-men, all equipped with the latest in battle-suit technology, also supplied by the Bloc, as Aguaria Major's capacity to create these battle-suits was none due to the fact 90% of its populace was off fighting off the invaders. They named them the Dark Avengers, calling their 100-million-man horde, as a whole, Every name i tried was already taken, to confuse the capitalist forces into thinking they were no threat at all. This, upon meeting the super-army, is exactly what the capitalists thought. Oh, how wrong they were. The Dark Avengers, under the symbol of the immortal and fiery Phoenix (which was also avian on purpose due to the Europa Alternian leaders' universal dislike of birds as well), wreaked an unspeakably bloody wrath upon Europa Alternis, and had defeated nearly their entire force, with no survivors on the side of the capitalists, within the span of a few days, and had used their vehicles, Aguaria Major's being battered and scarred, to head for the regional mainland, and start cutting a swath of destruction and death to the capitals of Europa Alternis. The few Europa Alternians that were able to escape the product of the fury of Aguaria Major traveled back to these capitals and told their practitioner-of-war-game leaders that they'd all made a terrible mistake, and that the Dark Avengers of Every Name I Tried Was Already Taken were on the path to taking the entire region. Thus, the Europa Alternian leaders called off their forces, never moving on Aguaria Major again, and issuing, after the Dark Avengers used their hyper-intelligence to argue their case, a formal apology to both Aguaria Major, and Every Name I Tried Was Already Taken, all the while the 2, the latter of which had been designated, officially, as a nation in case Aguaria Major was ever accused of war crimes, left the region as soon as this happened, as they had left it: scarred and weakened. So much so was the Dark Avengers' destruction of the region that after this conflict, many of the nations of the region died out. Today, only Halis king, the most fascist of the group, remains in Europa Alternis, destitute and still scarred.

With the Europa Alternian War won, Aguaria Major tried to assimilate the highly conservative (such is the ideal when running a military, which is the only thing the Dark Avengers were designed for, biologically) heroes of the nation into their extremely left-wing one. It didn't work out. The Dark Avengers almost staged a coup, which could've turned Aguaria Major into a military junto, only to be outwitted by a council of the smartest people in the nation, and led to a dead end, where they were imprisoned in a high-tech citadel which encased the Dark Avengers in a force-field. Realizing it was only a matter of time before their hyper-intelligence found a way around the prison, President Jatt Mames (who would later become the Hummingbird Emperor) decided he needed to do something about this issue, and fast, as the Dark Avengers were obviously too dangerous for anyone to possess, for a number of reasons. What he proposed was almost out of a cartoon. He waited for a typhoon to appear close to Aguaria Major, and, claiming to restore their status as heroes of the Aguaria Majorian military, sent them to conquer a made-up country, the route to which would take their ships and planes directly through the storm, hoping their utter devotion to follow commanding orders would not steer them around it. His plan appeared to have succeeded, as the Dark Avengers of Every Name I Tried Was Already Taken had sailed directly into the typhoon, and no sign of them was reported anywhere after that. A few years after this incident, the rest of Aguaria Major's modern history milestones would start to take place, for this is when President Mames forcibly made himself the Hummingbird Emperor, prompting the founding of Ceruleus by disgruntled Aguaria Majorian citizens and soldiers, only to turn benevolent shortly after, thus securing Aguaria Major as a haven for left-wing values forever. Decades later, Solitarius Unenlagia would be elected prime minister, and, in the Emperor's old and senile age, led the passage of a series of Congressional laws that would forever destroy any imperial or noble titles, and affirm Aguaria Major as a communist and socialist state, democratically controlled, forever, and ushered in great political reforms and economic programs that ushered in a Golden Age of Aguaria Major. During this Golden Age, Aguaria Major would conquer and annex Lavendoria in the Lavender War, making it a province of the nation, and using its resources to greatly increase the size of the Aguaria Majorian military. It would also open up trade relations with Ceruleus, and become so friendly with it that the two would enter the Ceruleo-Aguarian Commonwealth (CER-AG-COM), joining their two militaries. The reasons for this emphasis on military build-up is stated for a good reason, for they proved essential for protecting Aguaria Major from the Dark Avengers, when they reemerged, decades after they supposedly went down in a storm. During the time period in which all of this history of Aguaria Major took place, Every Name I Tried Was Already Taken had survived the typhoon, and landed their craft on a small, uncharted island in the Southeastern Pacific (where they set up a heavily fortified city, and ultra-conservative martial government, expanding, with their military tech, miles into the water, that would make up their entire nation, which they now ACTUALLY could be called), during which they realized what had happened to them, with their hyper-intelligence, and vowed vengeance, this time on Aguaria Major.

When the Dark Avengers mounted their attack on Aguaria Major, it came suddenly, and devastatingly. All the major cities in the nation were heavily bombed and assaulted by Revengean (the denonym on which the Dark Avengers had decided) troops, causing a devastating loss of life not seen in Aguaria Major since the Europa Alternian War. Recognizing the Dark Avengers from old military archives, the Aguaria Majorian military leaders, operating from a hastily-constructed base on a small atoll that was, for the time being, out of the knowledge of the Dark Avengers to be a place of settlement, devised a swift strike back at their former war machine, using all of the combined military might of Aguaria Major, Lavendoria, and Ceruleus, which, in an ironic twist, together greatly outnumbered, and, due to the relatively slow scientific advancement of Every Name I Tried Was Already Taken, as they had not come into contact with the outside world in decades, outmatched the Revengean equipment, greatly surprised the Dark Avengers. For the next 2 years, the entire home islands of Aguaria Major were enveloped in the first war ever fought on their soil since the ancient Aguaria Majorian revolution. It was a brutal and bloody affair. Even in the midst of great numerical and technological superiority (which one can view when comparing the 'Defense Forces' stat of Every Name I Tried Was Already Taken and the three CER-AG-COM nations), the Dark Avengers, due not only to their ferociousness, but to their extensive intelligence and knowledge of all the military tactics on Earth (which had been programmed in when they were first engineered), were able to drag the war out, with, even though CER-AG-COM forces eventually triumphed, terrible losses of life on the side of Aguaria Major, especially (as this is where the war was fought, so there were civilians to target), its largest province, Lavendoria, and Ceruleus. Currently, in the ashes of the Revengean War, the Dark Avengers, as it would be inhumane to kill them, are undergoing mental reprogramming, to make them think like normal humans (and to use their super abilities sparingly to the extreme), and their fortress of a nation, is being reformed, under the shadow of the Green Stars, to be another province (though currently, it is a colony) of Aguaria Major. This dream will someday be achieved, though the lack of speed at this process, due to the resistance of the converted Dark Avengers, shall be evident in the fact that Every Name I Tried Was Already Taken will bear a right-wing classification for some time, despite being under the possession of Aguaria Major.