by Max Barry

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The Fattest Citizens in The Slave Guilds

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

As a region, The Slave Guilds is ranked 331st in the world for Fattest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Plantation of Naughty Slave GirlsInoffensive Centrist Democracy“If all else fails, give her the whip”
2.The Republic of San Marino RedCapitalist Paradise“2017”
3.The Republic of West AxetonFather Knows Best State“Violence Solves Everything”
4.The Queendom of The Doctor and LolitaPsychotic Dictatorship“Do as I say and you *won't* get hurt”
5.The Disputed Territories of SchalaCorrupt Dictatorship“Bound to serve our masters.”