by Max Barry

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The Fattest Citizens in the Pacific

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

As a region, the Pacific is ranked 13,101st in the world for Fattest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
21.The Dictatorship of LaborvilleaCorporate Police State“Paix, Esclavage, et Force!”
22.The Allied States of Western trade confederacyIron Fist Consumerists“through unity we shall prosper”
23.The Collective Union of SeliberariCivil Rights Lovefest“Sustaining Liberty for All”
24.The Matriarchy of Crystal CovenCompulsory Consumerist State“Mother Knows Best.”
25.The Principality of Principality OF CampielloCapitalist Paradise“LIVE AND LET LIVE”
26.The Empire of DiescoCorrupt Dictatorship“Ad usque fidelis”
27.The Confederacy of Birz ZiruMoralistic Democracy“NEC DI NEC DOMINI”
28.The Free Land of Levia ParAnarchy“We Will Endure”
29.The People's Republic of Greater Ang LingInoffensive Centrist Democracy“Strength Through Compliance”
30.The Republic of Northern Panargion FrepCorporate Police State“Unity, Discipline, Work”
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