by Max Barry

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News round-up

Vats of anabolic steroids are being dumped into the ocean to make -Thanks-To Them-’s mussels the biggest in The Maritimes.

In Dregonia, mountain rescue missions can end with more people lost than found.

In Hrstrovokia, the giant 80-storey carving of President Radovan Gojković in Mount Rushless can be seen from space.

Supervisors in Iantopiia commonly tie bells on their necks to alert employees of their presence.

In Bay Roberts, the nation's black ops are starting to get on people's nerves.

The Lowest Crime Rates in The Maritimes

1. Hrstrovokia 156 in NationStates
2. Dregonia 1,182
3. Kalix 2,249

Middle: Rocky Mountain Ranger 67,490 - top 23%

Last: Economic Invincibility 306,078 of 306,269 nations

World first: Kindjal Groland
Eladen: Ducky II 375
Gay Equality: Pueros 1,769
Nudist Dreamland: Yannia 5,507

[quote=chayofa;55257516]News round-up

Vats of anabolic steroids are being dumped into the ocean to make -Thanks-To Them-’s mussels the biggest in The Maritimes.

You bastards.

The Most Cultured in The Maritimes

1. Kalix 377 in NationStates
2. Toney River 1,305
3. Dregonia 1,380

Middle: Each Uisge 8,673 - top 3%

Last: Hrstrovokia 306,200 of 306,705 nations

World first: Complexo Treitore
Nudist Dreamland: Yannia 8
Eladen: Undivulged Principles 119
Gay Equality: Midshire 582

News round-up

In Nouvelle-Acadie, chewing tree bark proves to have limited value during childbirth.

In Pointe-aux-Coques, frisbee games on college quadrangles are grounds for expulsion.

In Toney River, celebrities sit helplessly as they are labelled "pompous womples" by Leader.

In Blue Narcissus, exceptionally talented workers are praised more than Revolutionary heroes.

In Marcistani, juvenile delinquents are fitter than ever.

Great to get a mention but am trying to think which issue that comes from.

The Largest Information Technology Sector in The Maritimes

1. Hrstrovokia 404 in NationStates
2. Economic Invincibility 3,182
3. Iantopiia 4,995

Middle: Celestine V 131,526 - top 43%

Last: Kalix 306,415 of 306,849 nations

World first: Heliosphere Pencil Sharpeners Puppet Storage
Eladen: Undivulged Principles 74
Gay Equality: Midshire 565
Nudist Dreamland: Oktotheio 1,581

Average Income of Poor: First: Toney River. Second: Blue Narcissus. Third: Bedford Central School. All three are in the top 2%. … Middle: Bay Roberts top 11% … Last: CFCY bottom 1%

World first Despoticania The Alliance of Dictators
Eladen Undivulged Principles top 0.002% (4th in world); Gay Equality Midshire top 0.08%; Nudist Dreamland Yannia top 0.3%

My nation gets a bad press but has improved a lot over the years. Originally it was a Corporate Police State, I think. Something like that. When Russia attacked Ukraine two years ago I decided to make it a democracy because police states suddenly didn’t seem so much fun. Blue Narcissus has made it all the way to Moralistic Democracy, which is a good start, and is second in all the Maritimes for average income of poor. Not bad.

Health: First: Dregonia top 0.6%. Second: Iantopiia top 2%. Third: Marcistani top 3% … Middle: La Chicane top 23% … Last: Economic Invincibility bottom 0%

World first: Corsaria Katasia
Nudist Dreamland Yannia top 0.02% (58th in world); Eladen Ducky II top 0.2%; Gay Equality Pueros top 0.5%

Blue Narcissus wrote:My nation gets a bad press but has improved a lot over the years. Originally it was a Corporate Police State, I think. Something like that. When Russia attacked Ukraine two years ago I decided to make it a democracy because police states suddenly didn’t seem so much fun. Blue Narcissus has made it all the way to Moralistic Democracy, which is a good start, and is second in all the Maritimes for average income of poor. Not bad.

I started out as a civil rights lovefest but along the way have blended in with everybody else, not paying proper attention to the issues.

Book Publishing: First: TheMaritimes. Second: Toney River. Third: Bedford Central School. All three are in the top 0.2%. … Middle: Upalong top 3% … Last: Celestine V bottom 13%

World first: Lady Rose Lady Rose
Eladen Undivulged Principles top 0.0007% (2nd in world); Gay Equality Midshire top 0.06%; Nudist Dreamland Icarianna top 0.06%

Ça va ? everyone happy ?

Don’t know about everybody but I’m fine.

Agriculture: First: Hrstrovokia top 0.2%. Second: Economic Invincibility top 0.2%. Third: Blue Narcissus top 2% … Middle: Cybernetic Ultimate Hyena bottom 20% … Last: Kalix bottom 0%

World first: Aqualagoon Pencil Sharpeners Puppet Storage
Eladen Little Flowers top 0.03% (72nd in world); Nudist Dreamland SSN78 top 1%; Gay Equality Midshire top 12%

Hey Dregonia

Cape Breton Eagles NINE STRAIGHT WINS 🔥

Association Est: Baie-Comeau 109 points, Halifax 92, Moncton 83, Cap-Breton 81

Health: First: Dregonia top 0.6%. Second: Iantopiia top 2%. Third: Marcistani top 4% … Middle: Pointe-aux-Coques top 19% … Last: Economic Invincibility bottom 0%

World first: Corsaria Katasia
Nudist Dreamland Yannia top 0.2% (58th in world); Eladen Ducky II top 0.2%; Gay Equality Pueros top 0.5%

In -Thanks-To Them-, citizens often ask "what has information technology ever done for us?".

Hey hey hey salut la gang en forme ?

Recreational Drug Use: First: Upalong top 2%. Second: Chocolate Lake top 9%. Third: Marcistani top 9% … Middle: Charlottetown Islanders top 22% … Last: Hrstrovokia bottom 0% (36th from bottom in world)

World first: Cashdeer Pontbridge Islands
Nudist Dreamland Pencil Sharpeners top 0.0007% (2nd in world); Eladen Little Flowers top 0.02% (47th in world); Gay Equality Avalonde top 10%

In Dregonia, André Lévesque affectionately nicknames supporters by number.

Pizza Delivery: First: Blue Narcissus top 0.06%. Second: Economic Invincibility top 0.2%. Third: Hrstrovokia top 0.4% … Middle: Celestine V bottom 28% … Last: Kalix bottom 0%

World first: Mediobogdum the West Pacific
Eladen Little Flowers top 0.005% (12th in world); Nudist Dreamland: The Choir Boy top 0.1%; Gay Equality Midshire top 3%

In Bedford Central School, hackers post hourly updates on international summits.

Chayofa wrote:Pizza Delivery: First: Blue Narcissus top 0.06%.

Ordinarily I don’t like to draw attention, but when it comes to pizza I’ve something to brag about. 🙂

Residency: First: Chocolate Lake. Second: Centre Street. Third: Bedford Central School. Fourth: Upalong. Fifth: Blue Narcissus. Sixth: Toney River. Seventh: Rocky Mountain Ranger. All seven are in the top 0.2% … Middle: 1943 top 8% … Last: Cybernetic Ultimate Hyena bottom 40%

World first: Reploid Productions Space Sector RPRA
Nudist Dreamland Nudist Dreamland top 0.2%; Eladen Undivulged Principles top 0.3%; Gay Equality Homosexual Love top 2%

In Iantopiia, food voucher forgeries are causing headaches for the police.

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