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by Peepeepoopoocaca. . 8 reads.

Message From President Kittinger

My fellow PeePeePooPooCaCans,

Today is a great day for democracy, and our status as an influential nation in the Labyrinth. Together, we shall prevail and overcome any and all challenges that may come our way. I shall stand for the flag at all costs and do anything possible to defend freedom, liberty, justice, and Shrek. Before I talk about the policies we shall implement, I want to congratulate my opponents, Jake From State Farm, Karl Wheezinski, and all other candidates that ran for the presidency. I would also like to congratulate President PeePee, descendent of Pee I, my running mate, Christopher Jackson, and all the people who voted in the election. PPPPCC shall remain a member of the ESA indefinitely, but we shall never forget our previous ties towards the FSB. We shall continue to fund them while reducing hostile relations between nations, despite having barely any. We wish to keep it that way. PeePeePooPooCaCan companies shall continue to be a part of the international stock market, and the nation shall support capitalism above all else except Shrek. PPPPCC will enforce a progressive tax system in which the rich is taxed more than the poor, but not in an excessive manner. Tax cuts will occur from time to time to ensure economic growth. Government spending shall go more towards private sectors, education, welfare and NGOs/alliances than towards law enforcement agencies and the military. Law enforcement and intelligence agencies such as the PPPPCCNDS shall continue to have a strong presence over border patrol and overall security, especially in the East, but funding should decrease to reduce corruption and totalitarianism. Government surveillance should be strongly opposed as we shall continue to support the social security measures established by President PeePee that put us among the top 10% of NS nations in regards to safety. PPPPCC shall become a gun free state, and the military shall decrease by 4% annually. Regional Council and RMB involvement shall increase, but in a pacifist manner and I shall strive towards achieving equality and listening to the voices of our people. Government-run businesses should all close down in three years time, and we’ll continue to support small businesses and rising sectors. The right to freedom of speech shall not be infringed whatsoever, and the right to protest and vote will remain sacrosanct. We want to steer away from indirect democracy slowly but surely by allowing the people to vote on issues more frequently. Insurance shall be provided by the government but the people shall have the option to seek private providers, tuition fees shall decrease and wages shall rise due to progressive economic policies in regards to the minimum wage and increasing education spending to decrease tuition growth. Almost all immigrants shall be accepted and will be given amnesty shortly after arrival. Progressive laws in regards to firearms and gun ownership should decrease crime, especially from illegal immigrants. Immigrants shall receive government benefits in regards to education and healthcare just like anyone else in the nation and will also receive state of the art social security. Our 50 representatives and 10 moderators shall now serve two year terms and amendments will be made to allow immigrants and lower class citizens to run for these offices. I can’t wait to assume the presidency at midnight after saying the oath of office.

Long Live Our Glorious Giraffes
Long Live The FSB
Long Live The ESA
Long Live The Regional Council
Long Live The Labyrinth Chamber
Long Live Queen Ashtie
Long Live King Minos
Long Live The Labyrinth
Long Live President PeePee
Long Live Sir Ca
Long Live Poo The Great
Long Live Pee I
Long Live The Republic of PeePeePooPooCaCa
And LONG LIVE SHREK!!!

Thank you, may god and shrek bless you,
Maria Kittinger

Peepeepoopoocaca

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