by Max Barry

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Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,893rdLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3,445thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3,482nd
The Elven Monarchist Colony of
Father Knows Best State
Forever united
Haily Hark
Civil Rights
Below Average
Political Freedom

Overview Map Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population1.629 billion

LeaderHaily Hark


The Elven Monarchist Colony of Rainian is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Haily Hark with an iron fist, and notable for its flagrant waste-dumping, public floggings, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 1.629 billion Rainians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Industry, Education, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while International Aid and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Winchester. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 62.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Rainian economy, worth 227 trillion Ehrins a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Woodchip Exports, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Pizza Delivery. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 139,457 Ehrins, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 440,079 per year while the poor average 33,765, a ratio of 13.0 to 1.

The sound of office water cooler chatter has been replaced by the whirring of computer cooling fans, the monarch frequently needs protecting from misfiring protection, holiday-makers leave on the same clandestine boats that illegal immigrants arrive in, and young and brooding teens are welcomed with open arms to the Dogwarts School of Strangeness and Sorcery. Crime is a major problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Rainian's national animal is the Axolotl, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Rainian is ranked 280,682nd in the world and 697th in United Kingdom for Lowest Crime Rates, with 28.43 law-abiding acts per hour.

Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,893rdTop
Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3,445thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3,482ndHighest Crime Rates: 3,688thMost Avoided: 3,733rdMost Subsidized Industry: 6,446thLargest Mining Sector: 7,337thFattest Citizens: 9,476thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 10,562ndLargest Soda Pop Sector: 11,696thMost Patriotic: 12,641stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 13,651stTop
Most Efficient Economies: 15,198thMost Secular: 17,662ndLargest Black Market: 17,953rdMost Corrupt Governments: 20,555thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 21,349thHighest Average Incomes: 24,499thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 25,466thMost Scientifically Advanced: 27,421stLargest Information Technology Sector: 27,685thMost Valuable International Artwork: 28,322nd
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 3rd in the regionTop
Highest Crime Rates: 9th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 11th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 15th in the regionMost Avoided: 15th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 18th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 22nd in the regionFattest Citizens: 23rd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 29th in the regionLargest Black Market: 32nd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 32nd in the regionTop
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 36th in the regionMost Patriotic: 49th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 58th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 60th in the regionMost Secular: 64th in the region

National Happenings

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