The Little Caesarate of Pizzaburg is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Emperor Charles Entertainment Cheese with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, feral children, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 9.265 billion Pizzabourgeoisie are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Industry, although Spirituality is also considered important, while Healthcare and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pineapple-and-Hamburg. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Pizzaburguesque economy, worth a remarkable 1,115 trillion slices a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is dominated by the Pizza Delivery industry, with significant contributions from Soda Sales, Gambling, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is an impressive 120,392 slices, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 928,979 per year while the poor average 4,132, a ratio of 224 to 1.

The internal market is thriving, foreign policy is mostly just to smile and hope for the best, antacids top everyone's Maxxmas list, and children keel over while singing "Emperor Charles Entertainment Cheese Gives Us the Water of Life". Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Pizzaburg's national animal is the anchovy, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Church of Jesus Crust of Latter-Day Sauce.

Pizzaburg is ranked 126,172^nd in the world and 1^st in The Pizza Confederation for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring 2,012.9 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.