The Radiant Polarian Kingdom of Penguin Dictators is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Emperor Dorin with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, complete lack of prisons, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 29.214 billion Polsealians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Polsealia City. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Polsealian economy, worth a remarkable 8,448 trillion Krillems a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 289,205 Krillems, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The housing market has collapsed like an overbaked Brancalandian souffle, people stand their fridges back-to-front to benefit from the free heating, children grow up believing the sun to be a myth, and tourists call Polsealian beach towns "the fine coastline". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Penguin Dictators's national animal is the Frilly Elephant Bird, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Polsealianism.

Penguin Dictators is ranked 2,090^th in the world and 3^rd in Wintreath for Most Patriotic, with 106.18 flags saluted per person per day.