The Eternal Misfortune of Pencil Sharpeners is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Leader with a fair hand, and renowned for its rampant corporate plagiarism, hatred of cheese, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 21.416 billion Pencil Sharpeners live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken individuals is solely concerned with Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pencilpolis. Income tax is unheard of.

The imploded Pencil Sharpener economy, worth 119 billion Pencil Shavings a year, defies classification, with the entire state effectively one black market. Average income is 5 Pencil Shavings, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 38 per year while the poor average 0.3, a ratio of 127 to 1.

Children have only the most basic of education, farmers' market days almost always end in a shooting, citizens are expected to be armed at all times, and foreign despots proudly bandstand on Pencil Sharpener airwaves. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Pencil Sharpeners's national animal is the Pencil, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Pencil Sharpeners is ranked 316,388^th in the world and 74^th in Nudist Dreamland for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring -41.28 on the Hickory Productivity Index.