by Max Barry

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Paffnia was Commended by Security Council Resolution # 276
Largest Welfare Programs: 109thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 136thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 154th
The Protectorate of
Left-wing Utopia
Iuvans illos qui auxilium requirunt
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population25.8 billion

LeaderAleksandar Vekili


The Protectorate of Paffnia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Aleksandar Vekili with a fair hand, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, lack of airports, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 25.8 billion Paffniacs are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Skoptopolis. The income tax rate is 100%.

The powerhouse Paffniac economy, worth a remarkable 5,582 trillion paffnars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 216,374 paffnars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Census workers struggle to account for the rapidly increasing number of citizens to tabulate, national park visitors are reporting a rash of poison ivy sightings, saying 'Hi Guys' to a mixed gender group of people at work is a fireable offense, and beaches are empty as the shark population multiplies exponentially. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Paffnia's national animal is the llama, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Paffnia is ranked 20,546th in the world and 343rd in 10000 Islands for Most Scientifically Advanced, scoring 254.33 on the Kurzweil Singularity Index.

Largest Welfare Programs: 109thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 136thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 154thMost Advanced Public Transport: 269thMost Pacifist: 364thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 460thMost Advanced Public Education: 476thHighest Average Tax Rates: 481stMost Rebellious Youth: 500thLongest Average Lifespans: 508thBest Weather: 539thHealthiest Citizens: 592ndMost Influential: 610thSafest: 624thMost Beautiful Environments: 625thLargest Governments: 701stHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 754thNicest Citizens: 772ndMost Compassionate Citizens: 778thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 817thMost Cheerful Citizens: 827thMost Valuable International Artwork: 859thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 945thHighest Food Quality: 962ndLowest Crime Rates: 1,079thMost Inclusive: 1,081stSmartest Citizens: 1,184thLeast Corrupt Governments: 1,381stMost Cultured: 1,580thHighest Economic Output: 2,193rdHighest Poor Incomes: 2,285thTop
Largest Publishing Industry: 3,312thLargest Populations: 5,179thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 5,456thHighest Average Incomes: 6,071stMost Subsidized Industry: 6,849thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 7,067thMost Developed: 10,588thTop
Most Devout: 15,683rdMost Income Equality: 17,558thMost Scientifically Advanced: 20,546th
Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 2nd in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 2nd in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 6th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 6th in the regionMost Pacifist: 7th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 9th in the regionBest Weather: 10th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 10th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 11th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 12th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 12th in the regionTop
Nicest Citizens: 13th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 13th in the regionSafest: 14th in the regionLargest Governments: 14th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 15th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 17th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 18th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 18th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 18th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 19th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 22nd in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 24th in the regionMost Inclusive: 25th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 29th in the regionMost Cultured: 33rd in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 37th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 39th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 44th in the regionLargest Populations: 46th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 53rd in the regionTop
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 75th in the regionMost Income Equality: 75th in the regionMost Influential: 77th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 86th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 98th in the regionMost Devout: 121st in the region

National Happenings

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