by Max Barry

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Most Ignorant Citizens: 306thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 351stMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 408th
The Principality of
Father Knows Best State
North of the North Pacific
Influence
Minnow
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Northie

Population19.86 billion

CapitalNorth
LeaderNortherner
FaithNorthern Runes

CurrencyNortherner
AnimalNorthman

The Principality of Northie is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Northerner with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, compulsory gun ownership, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 19.86 billion Northies are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of North. The average income tax rate is 94.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Northiean economy, worth a remarkable 5,420 trillion Northerners a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 272,923 Northerners, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.2 times as much as the poorest.

The military struggles with recruitment, Northie's free colleges struggle to maintain standards in the face of overwhelming demand, the tenet of free speech is held dear, and explosive diarrhoea is not just a colorful phrase. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Northie's national animal is the Northman, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Northern Runes.

Northie is ranked 345,657th in the world and 6,015th in The North Pacific for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -22.13 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.

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Most Ignorant Citizens: 306thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 351stMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 408thMost Subsidized Industry: 420thMost Primitive: 488thLargest Black Market: 591stMost Corrupt Governments: 646thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 770thFattest Citizens: 1,487thLargest Mining Sector: 1,782ndMost Efficient Economies: 2,245thLargest Retail Industry: 2,375thMost Avoided: 2,475thHighest Economic Output: 3,156thTop
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Most Secular: 3,987thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 4,130thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 4,149thHighest Average Incomes: 4,185thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4,840thRudest Citizens: 5,205thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 5,302ndLargest Governments: 5,756thHighest Average Tax Rates: 6,351stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 7,603rdHighest Wealthy Incomes: 8,724thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 9,545thHighest Poor Incomes: 9,648thMost Armed: 10,167thMost Advanced Public Transport: 13,584thMost Influential: 13,655thLargest Publishing Industry: 14,396thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 14,706thNudest: 16,153rdTop
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Largest Populations: 18,760thLowest Crime Rates: 31,676th
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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 8th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 9th in the regionMost Primitive: 11th in the regionLargest Black Market: 16th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 16th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 17th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 25th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 31st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 34th in the regionFattest Citizens: 36th in the regionMost Avoided: 54th in the regionTop
5%
Largest Retail Industry: 81st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 86th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 95th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 102nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 134th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 137th in the regionMost Secular: 141st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 145th in the regionMost Armed: 148th in the regionRudest Citizens: 168th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 170th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 182nd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 191st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 191st in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 220th in the regionLargest Populations: 228th in the regionLargest Governments: 234th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 255th in the regionNudest: 288th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Poor Incomes: 348th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 399th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 558th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Northie, explosive diarrhoea is not just a colorful phrase.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, the tenet of free speech is held dear.
  • : Northie was reclassified from "Iron Fist Consumerists" to "Father Knows Best State".
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, Northie's free colleges struggle to maintain standards in the face of overwhelming demand.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, the military struggles with recruitment.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, groups of government workers are declared protected tribes if they venture too deep into the Capitol.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, people across the world seek to be healthier by eliminating carbs.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, priceless Maxtopian artwork can often be found in executive bathrooms.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, lonely children write fanfiction about absent fathers.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, power to the people comes from the barrel of a gun.

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