The Holy Empire of Nikolei iz Vashingtona is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its triple-decker prams, ubiquitous missile silos, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 240 million Vashingtonians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Defense, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 12.7%.

The very strong Vashingtonian economy, worth 16.6 trillion Rubles a year, is led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Pizza Delivery, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is 69,056 Rubles, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 236,397 per year while the poor average 14,822, a ratio of 15.9 to 1.

The "swords to plowshares" policy has created a generation of farmers that can kill a yak from 200 yards away, the "boy who cried wolf" policy makes sick people reluctant to call an ambulance, netizens fiercely argue over who loves Leader more, and scientific journals publish third-graders' school essays. Crime, especially youth-related, is well under control, thanks to a capable police force. Nikolei iz Vashingtona's national animal is the Brown Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Nikolei iz Vashingtona is ranked 282,873^rd in the world and 84^th in MJT for Nudest, with 38.25 cheeks per square mile.