The Spooky Legisoldier of Melicorium is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Chairman Stan Melix with a fair hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, irreverence towards religion, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 1.374 billion Americans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, corrupt, liberal, outspoken government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Administration, Industry, and Education are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cypress. The average income tax rate is 90.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Melicorian economy, worth 195 trillion dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 141,964 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Melicorium's children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region, terrified tympanists are finding themselves on the front lines armed only with kettledrums, the nation has declared war on all passing comets, and excited shovel-bearing geeks wander the countryside. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Melicorium's national animal is the mourning dove, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is state atheism.

Melicorium is ranked 177,754^th in the world and 6,557^th in the South Pacific for Least Corrupt Governments, with 91.45 Percentage Of Bribes Refused.