The Backgammon Aficionado of Marston Hefner is a colossal, efficient nation, renowned for its parental licensing program, national health service, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.824 billion Marston Hefnerians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Healthcare, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 78.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Marston Hefnerian economy, worth 925 trillion Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Retail, Basket Weaving, Gambling, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 104,914 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Fixing attendance at women's matches is a matter of "when they go low, we go high... funding", the Holy Office of the Inquisition is the highest court in the land, commuters travel in zigzags to avoid stalking accusations, and school lunches are made with hypo-allergenic wood pulp. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Marston Hefner's national animal is the Bunny, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Marston Hefner is ranked 50,106^th in the world and 1^st in Playboy for Largest Governments, scoring 22.41 on the Bureaucratic Comprehensiveness Rating Scale Index.