by Max Barry

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Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 4th Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 5th Highest Workforce Participation Rate: 5th
The Richly Blended Peoples of
Capitalist Paradise
Guns, Germs, Steel, and really smooth Mochas!
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population35.084 billion

CapitalFull City
LeaderGeneralissimo Barista Espresso

AnimalSchrodingers Cat

The Richly Blended Peoples of Koffee is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Generalissimo Barista Espresso with an even hand, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, infamous sell-swords, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 35.084 billion Richly Blended Peopleses are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Full City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Koffeean economy, worth an astonishing 30,439 trillion Cuppas a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Average income is a breathtaking 867,611 Cuppas, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 5,308,828 per year while the poor average 62,349, a ratio of 85.1 to 1.

Diners regard burgers made from mechanically reclaimed cow protein as "proper meat", the Great Pyramid of Full City can be seen from miles away, Generalissimo Barista Espresso's media campaigns take a hiatus around exam week, and Brancaland has gifted over nine thousand putrid moose carcasses to Koffee as a reminder of their "special relationship". Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, probably because of the absence of a police force. Koffee's national animal is the Schrodingers Cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Koffee is ranked 123rd in the world and 5th in Wysteria for Most Cultured, scoring 625 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.

Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 4thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 5thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 5thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 7thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 8thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 9thHighest Economic Output: 10thMost Scientifically Advanced: 14thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 14thLargest Insurance Industry: 16thSmartest Citizens: 18thHighest Average Incomes: 18thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 19thMost Avoided: 22ndLargest Populations: 23rdHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 29thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 32ndFattest Citizens: 35thLargest Mining Sector: 38thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 40thMost Armed: 41stLargest Gambling Industry: 44thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 45thRudest Citizens: 57thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 65thLargest Publishing Industry: 68thHighest Crime Rates: 71stMost Secular: 93rdMost Cultured: 123rdLargest Agricultural Sector: 124thLargest Retail Industry: 141stLargest Information Technology Sector: 424thMost Corrupt Governments: 588thMost Rebellious Youth: 827thTop
Most Efficient Economies: 1,725thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,910thLargest Black Market: 2,575thMost Influential: 5,370thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 6,270thMost Pro-Market: 7,696th
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionSmartest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 2nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 2nd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Populations: 2nd in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2nd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3rd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 3rd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 3rd in the regionMost Secular: 3rd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 4th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 4th in the regionTop
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 5th in the regionMost Cultured: 5th in the regionMost Armed: 5th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 6th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 6th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 6th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 6th in the regionFattest Citizens: 7th in the regionMost Avoided: 7th in the region

National Happenings

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