The Commonwealth of JWhistler is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by James T Painter with an iron fist, and notable for its deadly medical pandemics, smutty television, and fear of technology. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 9.454 billion JWhistlerians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."
The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Jamestown. The average income tax rate is 84.9%.
The frighteningly efficient JWhistlerian economy, worth a remarkable 1,463 trillion pounds a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Retail and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 154,851 pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.
Constipated-looking politicians are uptight about potty mouths, offering a builder a cup of tea is a legal minefield, money that should have gone to charities is instead spent on monitoring them, and terrorists who are 17th cousins with the ex-wives of half-brothers of citizens are now exempt from the immigration ban. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. JWhistler's national animal is the butterfly, which is also the nation's favorite main course.
JWhistler is ranked 337,663rd in the world and 8th in Last Flight for Nicest Citizens, with 0.26 average smiles per day.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, terrorists who are 17th cousins with the ex-wives of half-brothers of citizens are now exempt from the immigration ban.
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, money that should have gone to charities is instead spent on monitoring them.
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, offering a builder a cup of tea is a legal minefield.
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, constipated-looking politicians are uptight about potty mouths.
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, citizens can only enjoy the splendor of the natural world in designated 'Majesty Appreciation' zones.
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JWhistler was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Advanced Public Education.
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, the richest individuals apparently buy nothing but noodles and toilet paper.
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, jaywalking is punishable by public flogging.
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, crime suspects are forced to submit to blood testing.
- : Following new legislation in
JWhistler, estate agents justify funky smells by revealing how often the previous owners showered.