The Winter Princess of Improper Classifications is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Regent-Queen Santa Heverisk with an iron fist, and notable for its infamous sell-swords, zero percent divorce rate, and compulsory vegetarianism. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 5.65 billion Classifiers are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of North Pole. The average income tax rate is 99.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Classified economy, worth a remarkable 2,368 trillion Candy Cane Credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Cheese Exports, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 419,224 Candy Cane Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Executions are marked by quiet dignity and maybe a final round or two of whist, movie producers send film critics wads of cash in their morning newspapers in anticipation of gushing praise, citizens wouldn't recognise Regent-Queen Santa Heverisk if they passed one another on the street, and mandatory daycare is provided by the government. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Improper Classifications's national animal is the blahaj, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Blahaj is Bestism.

Improper Classifications is ranked 1,967^th in the world and 1^st in Femboy for Most Patriotic, with 108 flags saluted per person per day.