The Dictatorship of Hedonians is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Supreme Leader Kile with an iron fist, and notable for its pith helmet sales, compulsory military service, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 8.948 billion Hedonians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Administration, and Education are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hedonopolis. The average income tax rate is 95.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Hedoniansian economy, worth a remarkable 1,581 trillion Heds a year, is quite specialized and mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture and Tourism. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 176,691 Heds, with the richest citizens earning 5.7 times as much as the poorest.

Bug burgers are extra crunchy, this summer's chart-toppers sound almost the same as last year's, calling out of the blue has become taboo, and business is adjusting to new gender equality policies in the workplace. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Hedonians's national animal is the Three headed serpent, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Hedonians is ranked 72,317^th in the world and 265^th in Europe for Most Extreme, scoring 27.16 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.