The Awkward Adages of Geektopia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Nijchhōh I with an even hand, and renowned for its closed borders, barren, inhospitable landscape, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 12.948 billion Kwandoites are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mordecai. The average income tax rate is 97.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Geektopian economy, worth a remarkable 5,208 trillion cryptos a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Retail, Book Publishing, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 402,226 cryptos, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Descriptions of properties as "a stone's throw from the city centre" require a trebuchet to be true, Kwandoites caught jaywalking often have their houses seized by the police, an increasing number of knights in shining armor suffer from PTSD, and the government has pledged that not one drop of its citizens' blood will be spilt. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Geektopia's national animal is the ass, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Math.

Geektopia is ranked 287,703^rd in the world and 1,125^th in Europeia for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 10,860.11 Standard Monetary Units.