The Keisririik of Estonesia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Moonika Victoria II dira Nurmekuusik with an even hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, unlimited-speed roads, and devotion to social welfare. The devout population of 12.062 billion Ööselids have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Makassar. The average income tax rate is 95.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Ööselid economy, worth a remarkable 1,953 trillion Saarstels a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 161,931 Saarstels, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Scenic mountain valleys are flooded with water as damming projects get underway, mathematicians are gathering an infinite number of Barn Swallows and typewriters to see if they can recreate the works of Max Barry, drunk drivers are sent to rehabilitation paid for by the government, and anyone who so much as frowns risks being referred to a mental health unit. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Estonesia's national animal is the Barn Swallow, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Ööselid Pantheon.

Estonesia is ranked 313,011^th in the world and 1,487^th in Europe for Most Primitive, scoring -620.56 on the Scary Big Number Scale.