by Max Barry

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Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1,268thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,278thMost Subsidized Industry: 2,487th
The Holy Chronicle of
Iron Fist Consumerists
And upon the alter will also be placed my books
Influence
Handshaker
Region
Civil Rights
Rare
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Astinus

Population2.842 billion

CapitalPalanthas
LeaderBertram

CurrencySteel
AnimalScribe

The Holy Chronicle of Astinus is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Bertram with an iron fist, and renowned for its closed borders, frequent executions, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 2.842 billion Astinusians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Palanthas. The average income tax rate is 86.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Astinusian economy, worth 298 trillion Steels a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, Soda Sales, and Pizza Delivery. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 104,940 Steels, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Crime is on the rise as DNA sampling has been all but outlawed, children as young as eight can present logical proofs for the existence of the afterlife, undersea volcanoes receive strongly worded letters for violating environmental regulations, and libraries are refusing to stock A Midsummer Night's Dream because it has an ass in it. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Astinus's national animal is the Scribe, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Astinus is ranked 84,019th in the world and 3rd in The Library for Most Extreme, scoring 21.51 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.

Top
1%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1,268thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,278thTop
5%
Most Subsidized Industry: 2,487thMost Avoided: 4,060thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 4,868thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 5,338thNudest: 5,898thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 6,111thLargest Mining Sector: 6,635thMost Corrupt Governments: 7,076thMost Advanced Public Education: 8,999thLargest Black Market: 9,644thHighest Average Tax Rates: 11,373rdTop
10%
Most Efficient Economies: 12,555thLowest Crime Rates: 16,248thHighest Poor Incomes: 18,146thLargest Governments: 20,583rdMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 20,993rd

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, libraries are refusing to stock A Midsummer Night's Dream because it has an ass in it.
  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, undersea volcanoes receive strongly worded letters for violating environmental regulations.
  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, children as young as eight can present logical proofs for the existence of the afterlife.
  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, crime is on the rise as DNA sampling has been all but outlawed.
  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, nude art is becoming wildly popular.
  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, diplomatic fallout tends to be much more dangerous than radioactive fallout.
  • : Astinus was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Conservative.
  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, extraordinary rendition is nothing out of the ordinary.
  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, cleaners are very careful not to bump into the big red button on Bertram's desk.
  • : Following new legislation in Astinus, the bourgeoisie are asked nicely to hand over the means of production.

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